Lessons I need to learn myself

There are so many times where I sit down at my computer and have utterly nothing I can think to write about.
There are other times where there are countless things I'd like to write about but everything would just get all muddled up like words drowning on soggy paper.

This could be a post about heroes
or a post about dads
or a post about the holes in the night sky - the ones we silently worship like gods and kings.

Heck, this was almost an apology and an explanation to someone who might be a friend or an acquaintance or maybe even a stranger I have a history with

but I think that words can be anything you want them to be
one sentence can mean so many different things.
"For sale: Baby shoes; never worn"
"Strangers. Friends. Best Friends. Lovers. Strangers."
"She was lovely. Then things changed."
"Cancer. Only three months left. Pregnant."
"New start. New you. Not you."
"Scared to love, scared to hurt."


Sometimes the experience of making moral decisions is like a death in the family
and hearts don't beat the way you want them to
because hearts are more rebellious than teenagers who were always told how to live

Moral decisions are the material you're made from
and they're worth more than your money and your reputation combined

These are the trials you hear about in fairy tales
but they're harder than fighting a dragon because sometimes, you can't always save the princess
and what happens then and there is what you're made from

Moral decisions are not always fast,
not always defined,
and not always beautiful
despite what the media might tell you
because the worlds loves simple fairy tales
and hates looking reality in the eyes because humankind likes to believe we can transcend time
but we don't even bother to think that that could be a bad thing


your life is the story you were never told
and it has climaxes and things you're terrified of
and the stuff that dreams are made of
and unlike storybooks,
it's the opposite of unpredictable because where's the fun in a life we don't earn?

you'll ignite
and burn
and leave ashes behind
before you reignite
(you're a phoenix)

moral decisions -
the day b.c. becomes a.d.

high school (specifically) is the battleground where we fight the things you cannot see -
where we fight the shadows that exist in our own minds and our reflections in the mirrors and the words that ignorant people repeat over
and over
and over
until those words become our truth

but don't forget
that it's okay to feel lost
or broken
or incomplete

and don't forget that you are you
and although you may hate that, (I have this problem)
you've got the soft kind of hands that fit just fine with somebody else's,
and you've got empires to build and rule
or people to save
or words to write
and although that weight pounds on your chest like the sound of 'you're not good enough' or 'you won't make it to college' or 'you're the problem here'

don't forget that oftentimes,
the biggest, brightest buildings are built the strongest and the best in the blackest of night.